Post #44- Letting Go of Foreboding Joy

I’ve heard it said, and I believe it. The most terrifying, panic-stricken experience we can have is…..joy.  “Joy,” you ask? Yes…joy.

It’s an experience we’ve all had; just ask any parent. It’s that moment in which you look at your sleeping child with deep love, gratitude and joy, and then instantly find that you’ve almost slipped into a full blown panic attack at the very thought of anything happening to them. It’s the moment, in the midst of good news or a great accomplishment, that you remind yourself not to celebrate too enthusiastically because this “good” thing can’t last forever. It happens when we’re always looking back to yesterday’s pain or forward to tomorrow’s perceived heartbreak that we lose the precious experience of today’s blessing. Yes, in our letting go, we must let go of foreboding joy.

This has been a lifelong issue for me, though until recently I didn’t even identify it as a problem. I didn’t recognize that I wasn’t fully enjoying the good moments of life because I was too busy

·      Doubting their authenticity (“This seems too good to be true.”),

·      Waiting for them to end (“It won’t last!”),

·      Being suspicious of them (“Wait a minute, something good is happening to me?”), or

·      Finding fault with them (“Yea, that [good thing] might be so, but what about this [bad thing]?”).

Foreboding joy can be experienced in every area of life but can often be easiest seen in romantic relationships. When we meet a potential dating partner, so many of us spend way too much time “thinking,” rather than enjoying. We are either comparing this one to the last one or worrying about the future, what it may hold or if there will even be a future. And if we’ve been hurt in the past, we are on pins and needles just waiting on disappointment to show up and shatter our dreams.  Therefore, in ways both conscious and unconscious, we sabotage our own joy, leaving us with a self-fulfilling prophecy. Instead, I suggest that we stop chasing our joy away and just sit in it, and enjoy it.

Much as I’ve suggested we do with other emotions (did you read those posts?), joy is no different. We should sit and experience our joy, get lost in the moments of joy, and truly feel the energy of joy and gratitude, allowing it to fill our bodies and minds to the brim….and then running over!

Joy, like any other emotion, comes to teach us. Joy comes to form and transform us. Joy is our birthright. We don’t have to feel guilty about having joy. We don’t have to explain or rationalize our joy. Our job is simply to embrace it, welcome it and experience the fullness of it.

So, your “homework” from this post is to find those things in life that bring you joy. Find the music, the people, and the activities that lift your spirits and heighten your energetic frequency. Find that thing that makes your cells abuzz with the vibrational rhythm of joy and satisfaction…and then simply enjoy it. Stay at that place and just “be” in the feelings of love and inspiration. Don’t doubt it; don’t cut it short; don’t forebode it.

Let joy be your “natural” state of being, or your go-to place. Let go of anger, bitterness, and sadness and let joy abide. Let joy be your instinctive state. For,

This is not the end of your story. Your best days are not behind you; they are ahead of you.  Let go of foreboding joy, for joy is the secret to a long, healthy, happy life. When you reset or reboot, let joy be your natural instinct. Allow joy to overflow and open you up to all of the #bigthingscoming.

NOTE: If you’re new to the site it might be helpful to read the first (introductory) post. Also, feel free to post your questions or comments here and you can always reach out to me on Twitter @raycjordan using the hash tag #bigthingscoming.

(Copyright, 2013, Ray Jordan)